A lot of people complain about lousy first dates. If a first date isn’t great, should the person get another chance?


I know it sounds harsh but I really don’t believe in second chances in this regard. Now a date can be silly, or can go wrong in a way that would be humorous later when you tell the story (for example someone getting lost and ending up taking a back road and being late but still having a great time).

But lousy? No.

If you buy a product and they’re completely dissatisfied you return it and you likely won’t buy it again. If you go to a restaurant and have a horrible meal you might send it back but you don’t keep going to that restaurant. The idea that we have to waste our time on something that isn’t working is what keeps us trapped in negative dating experiences. If it doesn’t work check it off the list as a great experience and move on.

Know if all of your dates are lousy then we need to look at the process and understand what the underlying causes are. My theory is that if you present yourself authentically and brand yourself in a way that attracts your ideal mates you will have better dates.

Thanks for the question.